If you know how to read between the lines, a properly worded wedding invitation conveys much more than the who, what, and where. We’d like to let you in on the why of invitation etiquette so you’re always in the know.
Let's take it from the top! The first line of a wedding invitation usually indicates who is hosting the wedding. Traditionally, the bride’s parents foot the bill (and thus receive top billing).
If parents use titles, chances are you're in for a formal event
More and more, families are coming together to host weddings. If you notice two sets of parents at the top or inclusive language like Together with their families, it’s safe to assume that teamwork makes the dream work. 
You might also see a the groom's parents listed beneath his name and this can be indication that the wedding is being co-hosted; that said, this formatting is simply tradition on all Jewish wedding invitations
If the pleasure of your company is being requested you’ll be attending a wedding outside a place of worship. It could be at a glitzy hotel, sunny beach, or refurbished warehouse space. Conversely, the honor of your presence means you’re headed to the chapel, temple, or other religious venue. Let this information help guide your wardrobe selection.
Up next on the invitation is the couple and there really shouldn’t be any confusion about who is who, and why they’re so central. Date, time, and location are also pretty straightforward. If you get all the way to the bottom of the invitation and you see the words Reception to follow, you know the ceremony and reception are in the same venue and you can likely go grab a cocktail.
The reply card is the source of our most frequently asked question during our consultations: what is the M for?
The M—so mysterious, so misunderstood
Keeping in mind that consistency is key, if titles like Mr. and Mrs. were used on the invitation, you are being asked to respond in kind. Go ahead and use the title most appropriate to you and your guest. But how do you know if you can bring a date?
Take a look at how the envelope is addressed. Everything should be spelled out for you there. If your name appears solo, that is how you’ll be attending the wedding. If the event is for adults only, the envelope should indicate that as well; if your child’s name doesn’t appear on the envelope, it should be understood that they are not invited. Despite this tried and true rule of etiquette, some couples feel it's necessary to be more direct. We recommend something gentle along the lines of Respectfully, our celebration is for adults only.
As ever, On Paper is here to advise our couples on wedding invitation design and etiquette, but we hope that our beloved blog readers near and far will feel more in the loop as we enter wedding season.
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